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| My Extreme Sport | |||
| Idiot Skating is the newest extreme sport and its fun and funny. Hurting yourself has NEVER been this much fun. Idiot skating consists of going really fast and jumping into bushes and large grassy areas. while idiot skating there is many other thigns to do as well. Such as, jumping in fountains, harassing the A1A patrol, getting arrested, wrecking grocery carts, you know...the usual all around good time. |
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| How Idiot Skating Came About | |||
| idiot skating originated from two young girls watching the show "Jackass" on MTV. the two girls, Aylee and Alicia, then decided to slap on some skates and go hurt themselves. while on the asphalt they decided that they should jump drains and other dumb places that you cant really hurt yourself badly on. As the girls got more mad at life and boys and stupid people, they decided to do more daring tricks, like jumping in fountains, grinding in bank parking lots, and skating really fast and flying in bushes and grassy areas. Now the founders of idiot skating enjoy skating in church parking lots, running into old people in motorized wheel chairs A.K.A A1A patrol, getting in trouble from rollerblading in jiffy stores and shell stations, chasing dogs on leashes so their owners fly around like kytes, and jumping off concrete onto grass and looking like total jackasses. |
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| Tips Of a Pro | |||
| . Do not wear shorts, tank tops, short sleeve teeshirts, mid drift tops, or other slutty aparal while idiot skating. you could injure yourself (as if that wasnt the point) 2. Do not skate without protective gear. you may cause permanent damage which could result in no more idiot skating which could lead to ...depression, bad sex, no life syndrome, and obsessions with humping large dogs. 3. Do not skate with hot cappucino in your hands. i dont care how cold it is. you skate with that and you are doomed to fall and get some very nasty burns on your hands. (i know from experience) 4. Enter convenience stores as much as possible with no money and ask for a free cup of water. eventually the clerk will get very angry and ban you from the store which results in much laughter and good times. 5. When using grocery carts as a source of entertainment or an all around good place to bleed, make sure you take the one with three wheels and have many grassy areas for soft landings. 6. When you see the A1A patrol do not be rude. simply smile and say howdie you slow ass! move the fuck out of my way! 7. For extra enjoyment, rollerblade around doing funny stuff in front of solemn activitys such as funeral processions and sunday morning mass after the priest dies. 8. When crossing all roadway juncions, go very slow and pretend to fall until the driver decides to scream profanity at you incessantly. 9. When the PoPo asks you waht your doing reply "obviously pissing you off" and run. 10. and most of all...have major fun, hurting yourself, making an ass of yourself, getting in trouble, and be sure to enjoy the scrapes and gashes. Have a nice day =) |
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